Have you heard the news? The nation that gave us Shakespeare, Newton, and Burns is now offering a new contribution to world culture – an unbreakable pint glass! That’s right. Proudly unveiled by government officials on Thurs, this incredible British innovation of grog technology means that over-drinkers, embolden with liquid muscles, will no longer be able to smash their glasses on each other’s heads and use the shards as weapons to settle incoherent late night arguments.
Now, I don’t mean to be overly cynical but – really? Will a glass that won’t shatter make a difference? I suppose it’s possible. But isn’t an unbreakable pint glass like a reloaded weapon – able to be used again and again? Maybe the number of laceration injuries will decline but what about a possible upswing in blunt trauma? Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t deny anyone the enjoyment of a good beer now and then but it seems a problem if/when a country is so prone to drunken brawls that a special nationalized beer glass is needed to protect its population. Yet, that is apparently the case. With 87,000 alcohol-related glass attacks each year, it costs the British National Health Service £2.7 billion a year [$4.6 billion US] to stitch up and treat inebriated knuckleheads and their victims. A few years back Britain extended its pub hours, on the theory that longer hours would reduce binge drinking by people desperate to slam down as many pints as they could stomach before closing. That didn’t seem to work. Obviously the problem rests not with pub hours, glassware or even beer itself but with the foolishness of excess. Cheers.







Husband. Father. Senior Pastor of